The Advice You Don’t Want to Hear is Usually The Advice You Need
No one likes feeling uncomfortable, but it’s a big part of improving your performance and mental models
Oliver Burkeman said that in his last article for the Guardian. It’s one of his eight secrets to a (fairly) fulfilled life.
“…the advice that could really help is likely to make you uncomfortable,” he wrote.
You can read the whole piece about the secrets to a (fairly) fulfilled life here. Whatever you are constantly avoiding could be the way forward.
The secret to success lies in the very thing you’re avoiding. Those things that seem to get you out of your safe zone.
It’s always easier to put off everything that’s difficult to deal with or that make us question our existing assumptions or worldviews.
More often than not, you know exactly what to do, but you constantly avoid it, despite the evidence that making that step will be good for your life.
Many of us prefer the easy road. We possess a natural inclination to stick with the status quo, to resist the unknown, to stay comfortable. It’s tied to our ancestral drive to survive.
The bitter truth is, the brain has the ability to get attached to things very quickly and easily and unless you deliberately choose to intercept its process of work, it will keep fighting the change your want.
Most people spend a lot of time fixated everything “good” in their comfort zone. They refuse to ask more uncomfortable questions that can help them grow or become a better version of themselves.
Most things worth pursuing are outside our safe bubbles but your brain will do everything it can to avoid the uncomfortable goals, mindsets and better systems that can help you grow.
Each day we must consistently and bravely reinvent ourselves —become more of what makes us come alive. But that step is not easy. It’s hard.
If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten
Jerry Dunn once said “Don’t limit your challenges; challenge your limits.”
Reinvention is courage. It means doing the things that must be done, whether you like it or not. That takes guts — most people are not ready for that. So they hold back.
The uncertainties and wariness of change keep us in the same same patterns or situations which halts our ability to evolve.
You know gratitude journaling can help put you in a better mindset, but you keep avoiding it. Exercise is good for us but not many people can break the pattern to make time for even brisk walking or 10 minutes jogging every week.
Writing a half a page every day can improve your writing skills, but you just can’t make the time to sit and build that habit.
Eating for your brain health is great for us in the long-term, but we keep choosing the same diet options that can affect our cognitive skills.
Building a new skill can improve your odds of success but you are not ready to commit time and resources to become indispensable or a polymath.
Reading every day can improve your knowledge about life and living it, but the alternative is too comfortable to change.
No one likes feeling uncomfortable, but it’s a big part of improving your performance, how you work, mental models and learning in the long run.
Everyone wants a better life but many people are uncomfortable with the actions they need to take to make the change or to adapt to it.
To live fully, you must be willing to step outside that safe space you’ve created for yourself, now more than ever.
In order to thrive in today’s chaotic world, we must be willing to change our relationship to change and be ready for a paradigm shift, writes Bob Rosen Ph.D. of Psychology Today.
Change means, the brain has to adapt to a new environment and it will take some time for it to get adjusted. So start small. Don’t aim for radical change.
Sudden change can bring massive discomfort. Make small changes consistently. That’s how you build new routines, habits and behaviours that stick.
The challenge is to get past that initial feeling of wanting to return to the old habits, routines and patterns. But once you overcome that or make even the smallest step in the direction of your dreams, you can increase your chances of making a great change for your long-term benefit.
Breaking a habit, trying something new, taking a risk, making new connections, or putting yourself in a totally new situation won’t be easy, but it’s worth it. It’s exhausting but rewarding.
Calvin Coolidge says “All growth depends upon activity. There is no development physically or intellectually without effort, and effort means work.”
Dr Elizabeth Lombardo, Psychologist and author of “Better Than Perfect, says people who regularly seek out fresh experiences tend to be more creative and emotionally resilient than those who remain stuck in a routine.
“Breaking your own mold can only make you stronger and more confident to reach higher levels in your professional and personal life,” she says.
Challenge your mind — even making it a little uncomfortable by pushing yourself to learn tasks that may not come naturally. Most things seem impossible until they are done.
Think of the mind as a muscle that naturally tightens up over time unless it is consciously worked upon. Your personal growth significantly depends on new challenges and activities.